Intention

I recently stumbled upon an interesting article about migraines. The gist of the article suggested that migraines were the result of the body reorganizing itself to accommodate a larger, more authentic version of itself. The migraine happens when the part of me that wants to expand and evolve meets the part that’s afraid. 

The migraine is the teacher. 

A part of me buys this and a part of me doesn’t. 

I think the part of this that resonated is the narrative or self-talk I choose when I am sick - which is typically a migraine - although, like all humans, it can be as common as a cold. 

I was leaning into this - prior to my reading this article - the “what is my body telling me” … “my body is functioning in healthy ways” etc. etc. 

Pre-covid I averaged one, sometimes two colds per year.  They usually lasted a week and were manageable. Once COVID hit, I stopped getting sick - less the migraines. I wasn’t exposed to large groups of people and if people were sick, they stayed home.  

I’m just getting over a cold - it’s been a minute since I had one. Through the entirety of it I told myself I was healthy, my immune system was healthy, my body was doing everything it was supposed to do … cough to clear mucous, nose running to clear sinuses, exhaustion to force me to rest … 

It was in my system for about five days … so … healthy. 

When the exhaustion kicked in - the aches were there and it was hard to stay positive. I did not feel good. I wanted it to be over it. I wanted to be better. I had to make a conscious effort to give myself grace and show my body gratitude for doing everything it was designed to do. My body still remembers what to do - how to protect itself, how to fight illness.  This matters.

While I am not chronically ill - I am human. I want to ensure my body can consistently show up, fight illness, keep me healthy, keep me strong. I know I have to support that … I was in bed early, gargled with salt water, kept myself hydrated, had warm water with lemon and honey before bed, ate well … I didn’t need a doctor or medication - not for a cold.  It helped that I was able to sleep … how I felt wasn’t keeping me up through the night. 

What I liked about the article - things aren’t always going to go to plan. In those moments how do I choose to show up? Do I lean into a victim mentality? Why me? Am I able to still find gratitude? Think in terms of solutions? 

When the pain is so intense that I’m throwing up and crying because it gives me a momentary break, a release from the intensity … It's easy to feel sorry for yourself. So. Easy.

Taking a moment to be grateful that my body is doing something to push the pain out - that takes effort, that’s a choice. If I can find a way - in those moments - to find gratitude, doing it when things are good - well, that’s easy!

I’m not suggesting one ignores the root cause … find that, eliminate that - that’s where the article left a bad taste - it felt one sided … not holistic … I’m not ok with that. 

Living pain free, migraine free … that’s the goal. Understanding what drives mine? What triggers mine? How can I mitigate them? That’s been the journey. 

Working on positive narratives, making that a habit, even when it’s hard, that’s the muscle I’m currently training. Well. One of them. 

Gratitude isn’t about inaction … It’s merely maintaining an abundance mindset when things are going left. Practicing this. Training this … So it becomes a default way of thinking, of feeling, of being. 

Some days it’s the small things … I’m grateful I woke up just before my alarm, for time to enjoy my tea, for moving … this week - that I could sleep through the night, that each day I felt better then the day before, that my immune system was working and healthy. 

I had to travel to a conference for work … a head cold on a flight - not a good combination. So being healthy in time for that - SO grateful!

If you’ve ever been on a flight while congested … You understand this. It happened to me once - Lesson. Learned. 

While I can’t control much - I can control my narratives. I don’t necessarily default to negative thinking, it happens. Going through the motions of gratitude and not really feeling it, also happens.  If I’m leaning into intention, it takes practice - especially on days where intention feels hard. 

So - the article resonated … because it’s a tool. It made me pause, it made me think, there were pieces I could leverage and the pieces that didn’t work, well, those I could leave. 

My brain likes to reinforce ideas or concepts … some I implement immediately, sometimes it’s a process. Gratitude has been a process. Sometimes just going through the motions, without letting myself feel it, sometimes all in … Sometimes we need the jolt - the reminder - to kick us out of auto pilot. To bring back intention.