Heat Wave

I’m a fan of warm weather - of summer in general. Last year and this year the humidity levels have pushed temperatures into highs I’m not used to and for periods of time I don’t love.  The heat is almost unbearable and typically comes with dramatic pressure changes which can push me into headache and/or migraine territory. Which I really don’t love. 

This year the heat has come with air quality advisories - which makes everything heavier. It also means being outside is harder … events get cancelled, windows get closed, everyone moves indoors. 

I look forward to summer - I like being outdoors … walking, hiking, being on and in the water, on a patio, bbq’s … When the weather is like this, it’s harder for me to be outside … which is frustrating. Our summer season is already short - I don’t need or want it shortened.

Today the air quality is so bad the skyline is barely visible … The sun is hidden, you can actually taste it … I shouldn’t be able to taste the air. That can’t be good. 

The heat is also wreaking havoc with my planter garden. Drought resistance apparently doesn’t mean heat tolerance … Which is crazy to me … I legit thought the two were interchangeable. 

Apparently not.  

My cosmos are hanging on by a thread and my lavender and rosemary have yet to decide if they will make it.  

What’s crazier?  I haven’t had my board out since June. Admittedly, my aunt’s death has shifted priorities and some of my activities … But my friends haven’t had theirs out either and they are pretty hard core paddlers. 

A few of my friends are also better suited to over the top heat … I’m not built for it. I’m prone to heat stroke, heat rash, I burn, I get headaches and/or migraines … It’s amazing that I love this season right?  

Laughs. 

I know. Yet here we are. 

I miss walking outside … I’m looking forward to getting outside again … I’m holding out hope that the humidity will drop and reasonable temperatures will return!  By reasonable - I mean I can walk outside without needing to rehydrate and shower, I can keep windows open in the evenings and get fresh air through my place … I’m not asking for much!

The upside - the air is moving today. It wasn’t for most of the week - which makes it heavier. I feel it at the base of my skull and through my neck. Thankfully - and weirdly - electrolytes seem to help with that?  I don’t fully understand the how or why … I don’t understand the science behind it - at all!  I know it helps. So, I keep taking them. 

Surprisingly - I can still manage the sauna.  

Dry heat.  I’m convinced this is why. Since I can’t walk outside - I’m using the track at the gym … Which means I’m showering and using the sauna in the change room.  I’m not going to lie.  I love the sauna.  I know … it would baffle me too … Since the sauna is relaxing - I accept it and don’t over think it. When I’m there - it’s quiet … I’m there early, and at this time of year a lot of people have memberships on hold … which gives me the sauna to myself on most days … I can lie down … breathe … meditate … I’m usually in there for 15 minutes … that is my sweet spot!

One could argue I could just stand outside … save myself the membership fee … I think the difference is humidity which equates to the weight of the heat.  There is no weight to the heat in the sauna - which means my body can process it … can handle it … can relax into it. 

I am trying to figure out how to better manage the heat we’re experiencing.  It’s a tricky one. The air quality issues are temporary - I hope - they appeared this week because of wildfires … I’m hoping that parts of the world being on fire is not the new norm … that might be one of the lies I tell myself because the truth is too worrisome!  Being outside matters to me … I need it. I feel like I’m wasting what little summer I have when I’m spending all my time indoors. I also don’t want to be sick … the toll the migraines take is getting bigger … It takes me longer to rebound from them - to recover.  I don’t love that. I worry about that. I also don’t want to be dependent on medication. They are expensive and don’t necessarily prevent migraines - given my triggers. The side effects of the meds are similar to what you get with a migraine with the added benefit of increased risks to my heart and liver … so … why? 

I realize it sounds like I expend a lot of energy thinking about migraines and/or headaches. I think it’s one of those things, that when you have something that can be so debilitating, it's just always in the back of your mind. It’s not that I worry about it - it’s more that I sense it.  Changes in my body’s responses to its environment … emotional, physical … the migraines have taught me - over time - that those changes are my body talking to me … something is wrong, stay alert, this is good - more of this etc. Listening to the quiet, nuanced messages helps prevent the loud, stop me in my tracks messages - so I’ve learned to listen. 

The funny thing … sometimes I see the quiet, nuanced responses in others … sometimes - not always. It helps me read a room, identify risk, adapt strategy etc. It’s been helpful in my workplace, in the functions I perform etc. Sometimes it feels like a superpower.  Sometimes.

Do I always get it right? Ha! No. Nuance is tricky - even with myself - context is everything and with others - I don’t always have context. Sometimes the nuance is fascinating - other times it’s completely overwhelming.  

I will remain optimistic that the humidity will drop in the coming days and I will be able to return to the outdoors and forget about the unbearable heat … I’ll be back on and in the water … Sitting on patios and generally enjoying the pleasure of being outdoors in the summer!  

Optimism is my current sword … that and hope … I will be enjoying the outdoors again soon … even if I have to will it into being!  Summer is too short to be spent indoors … heat wave or no heat wave … summers are meant to be spent outside … on bodies of water … on patios … with friends … that’s just the way it is … the way it should be … the way I want it.